The Date Has Been Set!!!!!!

I have been horrible at keeping my blog updated and I am sorry for those of you who actually like reading my randomness.  A lot has been going on around here it seems like. Jake as been working really close to home so he is able to come home on the weekends.  I have really enjoyed this. The kids have loved having their dad home.  He is so good with them. He has had them outside digging in the dirt and having the girl collecting worms ;)  They are his little helpers and they love it.  My yard is starting to look awesome.

We celebrated our 8th anniversary on the 5th of this  month.  It is so crazy that we have been married that long.  We have been together for almost 11 years.  I knew when I met him we were suppose to be together.  Not saying things weren't a little hard at times but we made it through them.  Now we are about to take our next big step and that is being sealed for time and all eternity in the Logan temple on the 30th of June!!! I am so excited for this I can't even describe it.  We were married on the first Thursday in June and we will be getting sealed on the last Thursday in June.  Jake says I am weird but I think that is kind of cool.

Getting to the temple hasn't been a walk in the park and its been a emotional process.  It has brought us closer than we have been in a long time.  It is so overwhelming when I look back at the last few years and see how far I have come.  All because a dear friend of mine saw something in me that I didn't see in myself and made me feel like I could do it.  The next month is going to be hectic but it will be great. If any of you want details on our sealing please let me know!! Thanks for all the support and love. Keeps us in your prayers for the next month cause I know its not going to be easy cause a certain someone is going to try everything he can to keep us from our goal and he is not going to win!!!!!

WOW!!!

   Since my last post somethings have changed.  The Wednesday after Jake was ordained and Elder I got a phone call asking if I could meet with the bishop. I said that wouldn't be a problem.  I thought it was just going to be an interview to get me going on getting my temple recommend. Boy was I wrong.  When I showed up to the church and Brother Jones met me at the door and went into the Bishop's office with me I knew this wasn't a temple recommend interview this was a calling interview.  They told me how the Lord had a road map set out for me and that map had brought me to his office.  He asked me if I would be willing to be the Primary Sec. I was a little nervous about it but I said yes that I would.  Well I got a call that Saturday from the Bishop and he asked if he could stop by my house for a min.  I said that would be fine.  I had a bunch of thoughts running through my head thinking what did I do now!! I haven't even started my job yet.  When he came by he said there had been a miscommunication and he needed me to be the 2nd counselor. Well this is  a even bigger job cause it requires  me to actually teach the kids.  I thought about it for a min and I had a good feeling so I said yes!  The sisters in the presidency are just great!! I am very excited about it!!

   In Jake's blessing he was blessed that his work might bring him closer to home.  We all laughed a little about that cause he never works very close.  He works for my uncle right now and he was there for the blessing and said looks like we might be getting work closer to home because of your blessing. We all laughed about that too. Well here we are a month later and he is working close to home for at least 5 months.  I have been praying that this would happen so that he could attend the temple classes with me so that we can get to the temple soon and it now looks like that will happen.  June is our goal!!  I do believe our prayers have been answered!!!
  
   Our life is changing by leaps and bounds!! I can't wait to see what waits ahead!!!! 

  And if men come unto me I will show them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.   Ether 12:27

   I have thought about the above passage a lot over the last few months.  Out of all that I have read this passage hits me the hardest.  For the longest time I thought of myself as someone who had their stuff together, boy was I wrong.  Over the past 3 years I have had trial after trial come before me and I got through them, or so I thought.  Little did I know I was just brushing things under the rug.  Then one day it all came to a head and I fell apart.  I realized I wasn't as strong of a person as I thought I was.  I pulled out a copy of the Book of Mormon that my kids had gotten from their Aunt Nicole and started thumbing through it.  I stopped at this verse and read it over and over.  I had been shown my weaknesses without the rose colored glasses that I had been wearing for far to long.  I finally realized what had been missing in my life and what I needed to do. 

  I have made the changes that I needed to do and I am still making changes.  Each day is a test and more days than others I pass but there are days that I start to question if I am strong enough to pass these tests put in front of me.  When I get thinking like I open my scriptures and read this passage over and over till I get the feeling that everything will be okay.  I loving what my changes have done to my family and how close we have gotten.  I love how me and Jake sit and talk about church stuff all the time.  It has been an adjustment but not a hard one.  I have been humbled and I know that one day my weaknesses will be made strengths.

  We had the most wonderful weekend.  We went to Stake Conference where Jake was sustained and Elder in the church.  Sunday night some of our family members and friends came for dinner and then went with us up to the church where Jake's dad Tony ordained him as an Elder.  The blessing was so beautiful.  I am so happy that my husband is now a priesthood holder.  Our journey is just getting started and I am so excited about where we will end up in the end!

Time for an update!!

  Well it's been awhile since I have updated this thing so i figured I had better get on it.  Not a whole lot has really been going on in the last month.  Kids have all been pretty healthy for the most part and so have I.  I went to the doctor today for my monthly infusion and it went pretty good. Jake is still working in southern California. He hates it and wants to come home.  I want him to come home.  He will be flying in on Friday and will be getting ordained and Elder.  I am very excited for this to happen. It puts us that much closer to the temple.  We had our pa blessings done and it was such a neat experience.  I can't believe I waited this long to have mine done.

  Been going through with drawls from the race track.  I haven't been to one chariot race this season and I kind of miss it.  I miss playing with the horses and the adult interaction after a week of being with the kids.  I miss the friends I made down there.  I am hoping to make it to Worlds in a few weeks but we will see.  I had such a good time down there last year and I would kick myself if I didn't at least go to one race.  Last year I didn't miss one!  I am hoping to get feeling good enough that I will be able to start riding them again with my cousin Cody.  We got really close over the past year and it makes me really happy that we can share something together.  Although he has made a kind of career as a jockey, I would like to run one race and then I would be happy. But for now I will take just galloping them!

Well got a busy week and month! Hopefully my next post will be longer with some good news about a temple date!!

     Well the last two weeks have been really nice.  Jake has been home for two weeks and I have loved it.  He has been so helpful with the kids and it has given me a much needed break.  I have been hurting really bad lately cause I have gone off one of my meds.  It was a shot that I was giving myself once a week and its called Methotrexate. For those of you who don't know what that is, it's chemo.  Needless to say I felt like crap for 5 out of the 7 days of the week.  My hair is pretty thick so the hair loss that occurs isn't that noticeable.  Another side effect is my liver freaks out and I turn a lovely shade of yellow.  We are going to try something else but in order for that to happen I have to be off that medicine for at least 4 months. I will be two months in on the 10th.  It has been a long two months.  I go this Friday for my month IV infusion and I can hardly wait. This new medicine has been helping a lot but I am a little nervous to see how it works when it's not paired with the other drug.  They usually walk hand in hand. I am pretty hopeful the new thing we are going to do will help a lot for a little while. It could take a few months till we know for sure if it will help. So all in all I am looking at a good six months till I know if the new thing will work. Two months down tho! 

     Jake leaves this Saturday to go to Southern California for work.  He will be out there for a few months but he will be flying home as often as he can and I hope to go out and see him at least once since I have never been to California.  We are both getting our patriarchal blessing done on the 13th of February. I am very excited about this.  It is something I have always wanted done.  Jake will be ordained an Elder on the 6th of March and then we are temple bound as soon as the Bishop gives us the okay.  I am so excited.  I am hoping to go in June but I am not picky. I will go whenever the Bishop says we are ready.  I have been truly blessed and continue to be blessed each and everyday!

Changes are coming!

      I have been lacking in keeping my blog updated because of all the things that have been happening in our lives.  We have been experiencing such great things these days.  We met with our bishop last Sunday and I left with the most wonderful feeling.  As we sat there and discussed the things that need to happen and when he gave us a small idea of what will happen once we are in the walls of the temple I broke down in tears.  To think that I have been denying my family the blessings that come from being sealed to each other was almost to much to think about.  The feeling of peace I got when I closed my eyes and pictured it in my mind the tears increased in pace.  Our bishop was very excited to see our reaction to the things he said. He said he can see how much this means to us and wants to get us going asap.

      First step is getting Jake ordained and Elder and we are happy to say that if everything goes as planned that will happen March 6th.  The blessings we will receive by having a priesthood holder in our home will in measurable.  We will also be starting temple readiness classes as soon as it can be arranged. That will be a little hard with Jake being out of town a lot but the bishop seemed to think it would all work out. 

     I find myself very weepy lately.  I am not sure why that is.  I wish I could blame it on being pregnant but I know for a fact that is not the reason.  I do think it is because I am so in tuned with the spirit these days I just don't know what to do with all the emotions and they are flowing right out of me.  The missionaries told me once that the Holy Ghost doesn't "hit" you over the head very often but when he does you know it and your life changes forever.  I can attest to that for sure. October 10th 2010 is the day I was "hit" over the head and decided I needed to make some changes in my life.  I have always wanted to go to the temple with my family but always figured we could go later.  Well, we are never guaranteed later.  One never knows what will happen day to day.  The very thought that I could walk through eternity alone and without my family makes me sick.  I am going to live my life the way that He would have me live it so that I along with my family will be worthy to walk with Him again one day.  It is going to be a long hard road but I know that if I stay close to my family and my faith, we will get to our goal!! I love each and everyone of you and if you haven't found the peace I speak of I truly hope that one day you to will be "hit" over the head!!!

2010 is ending!!

     Well as then end of 2010 comes very near, I can't help but sit back and think about the past year.  We had a lot of challenges and blessing in this last year.  Our biggest challenges continue to be Jake working out of town a lot and my health  My arthritis seems to be under control for the most part with the occasional flare up here and there. Which is to be expected with this disease. 

   Lately I have thinking about the future and what I would like to do in the coming year.  The biggest thing on my list is have another baby but this one will be hard to achieve.  I am blessed with 3 beautiful children that keep me hopping day to day and I love it! But I have this feeling in my heart that there is someone missing.  When I have talked to family or friends about it they tell me I am crazy and not healthy enough for it.  It upsets me every time I hear this and makes me start thinking maybe I am really not healthy enough for it.  But that nagging feeling keeps coming back and it is so strong at times that it makes me want to cry cause I feel so helpless to do anything about it.  I know I sound crazy I guess. 3 kids alone half the time how could I possibly do it?  I have tried really hard to convince myself to be happy with what I have now and I am but its just that feeling that keeps coming back.  Jake keeps telling me he will think about it but we have all been kids and know what that always means. NO!!  I just wish men could feel what us mothers feel when we have that baby growing inside of us and know beyond a shadow of a doubt that it is truly a gift from God.  I have been very blessed to have experienced this 3 times and maybe I should be content with that but it is really hard to except.

     Maybe with some praying and thinking, both me and Jake can come to a decision that will benefit the family and we will both be happy with it.  I hope you all have had a wonderful holiday season and that the new year find you all happy and in good health.